We invented words; we'll tell you how they're supposed to sound.

It's exciting to have a role in anything that's Claymation, just because you're always intrigued by what a clay wizard version of yourself would be.

I watch one news channel until my soul can't take it anymore. It's the background of my life.

Being a Mets fan is like lending someone a lot of money and you just know that you'll never get paid back.

One thing that America is objectively exceptional at is overreacting whenever anyone accuses them of not being exceptional.

Southern people are bigger-hearted and kinder than I had any right to expect.

Welcome to The Daily Show, I'm John Oliver. Jon Stewart is still not here. He is currently living out a live-action Lord of the Rings role-playing experience deep in the New Zealand wilderness.