I demand my right to a private life, just as I respect that right for everybody else.

Believe me, you don't walk away from the kind of money you make with a daily television show. You might get awful tired of it sometimes, but take a second look at the check and you get less tired right away.

People will pay more to be entertained than educated.

I'm an entertainer, not a commentator. If you're a comedian your job is to make people laugh.

Having money gives me the freedom to worry about the things that really matter.

It was so hot today that Burger King was singing, "if you want it your way, cook it yourself".

The Champagne they have stored is getting more valuable every year.