If you’re not happy looking a knob in the face, there’s something wrong.

Me in a one-man tent crouching over carrier bag. It's not just the lowest point of the trip. It's the lowest point ever. In 38 years.

I always have a problem liking things I'm told I should like.

A problem solved is a problem caused.

Does the brain control you or are you controlling the brain? I don't know if I'm in charge of mine.

That's the problem with them fables, they're putting animals together that wouldn't meet. I don't know where a scorpion is knockin' around with a frog.

If you’re worrying about the wrinkles on your bollocks I’d say your life’s pretty good