If you’re not happy looking a knob in the face, there’s something wrong.

Fishing: I don't really like it. I don't really like the expression on the fish's face.

Avocados, it's a food that ain't worth injuring yourself for. If it's a hassle to get into, leave it to the experts.

The Web is the new book though, innit?

I was impressed by the Taj Mahal. A good bit of work, well looked after, worth paying money to see.

Why didn't evolution make a giraffe good at carpentry so it could build a ladder?

We're gonna get weaker. That's already happened. They used to say, you know, an apple a day keeps the doctor away. Now they're saying eat five fruits. That's evidence. You can't argue with that.