The problem I have with all this religion stuff is that I can't relate to it. I think most people got into 'cos it gave them something to do on a Sunday, but since all the shops are now open it isn't required as much.

It's not a joke: I really do like being at home.

There’s fish in here that I’ve read about that are so see-through that they’re invisible. So I don’t even think they know they exist.

If you’re not happy looking a knob in the face, there’s something wrong.

The poorer people and criminals of Mexico who are not very religious but not quite atheists, either, worship Saint Death.

People moan about drugs being tested on animals. I sort of think it depends innit. If the drug's aspirin and the monkey's got a headache, is it right?

Avocados, it's a food that ain't worth injuring yourself for. If it's a hassle to get into, leave it to the experts.