We're gonna get weaker. That's already happened. They used to say, you know, an apple a day keeps the doctor away. Now they're saying eat five fruits. That's evidence. You can't argue with that.

I've never understood the 'things to do before you die' idea. If I was ill, I'd be in no mood to have a swim with a dolphin.

Who'd have thought the Frisbee would have caught on?

Yesterday, I did some painting then went out to buy an onion and came home and watched 'University Challenge.' The onion was probably the highlight.

It's no good operating on eyes if your eyes are asleep.

When you've been on a programme called 'An Idiot Abroad' job offers aren't exactly flying in.

Fishing: I don't really like it. I don't really like the expression on the fish's face.