Whether it's a potato or a nut, it's a foodage!

If Camels are the ship of the dessert, this one is the Titanic

I know who I am. Bloody hell, I'm getting enough bills for Karl Pilkington so I hope I am him, 'cos if I'm not, I have no idea who I'm paying for

I don't really like surprises. Not big ones anyway. Just having a pack of Revels holds enough of a surprise for me.

We came from the sea originally, now we're going back in it. Don't go in it, unless you're in a boat.

I always have a problem liking things I'm told I should like.

I could eat a knob at night.