We've invented most of the stuff that we need and now we're just messing about

The other day I was thinking - because I get a lot of headaches - I was wondering whether the head should be where it is. Because, at the end of the day, it's probably the heaviest part of your body, right? And yet it's at the top as opposed to, I don't, dangling at the bottom somewhere.

I just sort of go along and say what I think -and that's all you can do in life, really.

There's a lot of idiots in the world, so live with it.

The cafe was called Tattoos. The fella who owned it didn't have any tattoos... but we never saw his wife.

Be the ugly one, look at the nice one.

A block of blood should not have the word "cake" after it...they might as well say "shite gateau