If you are living the dream, how do you know if you are asleep or awake?

I find that if you just talk, your mouth comes up with stuff.

I'm not a proper traveler. I don't like to be challenged or have too much of a change and prefer a week away just to relax.

The cafe was called Tattoos. The fella who owned it didn't have any tattoos... but we never saw his wife.

A slug is always on its own. It's a lonely insect.

When you've been on a programme called 'An Idiot Abroad' job offers aren't exactly flying in.

If you'd have told me five years ago that I'd have done all this - two books, some television and everything - I'd panic, I'd be scared.