I have a no-apology policy. No apologies for jokes. I apologize in my real life all the time. I say ridiculous things, I make mistakes constantly. But when I'm on stage, I'm at a microphone it's a joke!

I did feel very sexy and desirable. Those prisoners looked at me like no man ever did. I don't care how many people they killed.

I love to work. I love doing standup.

To give up my job as a temp and actually make a living doing comedy, it was staggering.

I'm also doing a special for Comedy Central called Autobiography. It's going to be a spoof of Biography.

When I see you, I smile. When I touch you, I feel you. When I kiss you, I love you!

My friend Anderson Cooper is the scion of one of America's great shipping and railroad families, the Vanderbilts.