I prefer being known for my stand-up because I write it. I love being an actor, and saying other people's words is great. But then, when I do stand-up, I love getting my own point of view out there.

When I'm going to see a comedian, I don't want to see them hold back, and when I'm reading a book, I don't want to hear an abridged version.

It is a challenge, with the global fame, to try to act like I put my pants on one leg at a time, when in fact I have Pippa Middleton help me put my pants on every morning. She's my lady-in-waiting as well.

I can say whatever I want. So do not bring the kids. It's definitely rated R.

I do feel I'm kind of a magnet for crazy, and if there isn't enough crazy, I will insert myself in a situation that I feel has comedy potential.

The thing that bums me out about 'The Real World' is I don't want to believe that teenagers are that stupid.

I have a no-apology policy. No apologies for jokes. I apologize in my real life all the time. I say ridiculous things, I make mistakes constantly. But when I'm on stage, I'm at a microphone it's a joke!