I have friends who are going through chemotherapy, and they make the darkest, most hideous cancer jokes you've ever heard.

To give up my job as a temp and actually make a living doing comedy, it was staggering.

I believe fully in making fun of children. I believe very strongly that you should never make fun of an embryo or your ovaries. I am a big believer on breaking those rules. It's a case-by-case basis. But the thing is, there's so many ways to make a joke about something that is sort of maybe verboten or something.

Gwyneth Paltrow names her kid Apple. I'm not going to let that stand.

I'm not an artist. I tell inappropriate stories and jokes and I try to make people laugh.

The thing that bums me out about 'The Real World' is I don't want to believe that teenagers are that stupid.

I'm basically always on tour.