One of the simple but genuine pleasures in life is getting up in the morning and hurrying to a mousetrap you set the night before.

Another bad thing about "prosperity" is that you can't jingle any money without being under suspicion

A bee is never as busy as it seems; it's just that it can't buzz any slower.

Don't a fellow feel good after he gets out of a store where he nearly bought something.

There ought t'be some way t'eat celery so it wouldn't sound like you wuz steppin' on a basket.

Every father expects his boy to do the things he wouldn't do when he was young.

If there's any literary ability in a feller, getting fired out of a good government job will bring it out.