The Democrats and Republicans are the same guy admiring themself in the mirror.

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

We've got to clear some of the room out of the prisons so we can put the bad guys in there, like the pedophiles and the politicians.

All my adult life I've been in the practice of giving advice to people who are happier than I am.

Yes, I'm a Judeo-Christian. Jesus and Moses are in my heart. And both of them were independents, by the way.

I support gay marriage. I believe they have a right to be as miserable as the rest of us.

Inspiration thing is important, to teach the kids that JFK is not an airport, RFK's not a stadium, Martin Luther King ain't a street