Most of the people I know in comedy are not weird or messed up.

I would love for people to know that the label feminist is something that everyone should wear proudly, because it just means that you support women.

He resisted for a while and there were some legal boundaries, you know, keeping me from being near him or his family, but in the end, love overcame. And I got what I wanted. I always get what I want.

Guys. If your pants are below your ass you have no right to accuse any lady of dressing slutty.

You're looking good today Bret. Very hot... hotter than Jemaine. You have a refined bone structure, while Jemaine's facial features are too deep set to be classically handsome.

As you can see, I speak many languages, including the language of sex.

I would imagine that Bret would taste like a warm goat cheese, and Jemaine would taste like harvati with dill. Hmm...I'm hungry actually.