Still blows my mind that toilet paper isn't free.

I would like to be known as someone who was really sweet but also knowledgeable in all areas of life.

I used to carry a rabbit's foot for luck. Then it was a monkey's paw. Now it's a camel's toe.

Mel: What was your name again? Rain: Rain. Mel: Oh that's nice. Kind of like bad weather.

He resisted for a while and there were some legal boundaries, you know, keeping me from being near him or his family, but in the end, love overcame. And I got what I wanted. I always get what I want.

Guys. If your pants are below your ass you have no right to accuse any lady of dressing slutty.

Some women were talking about how I put out. And that's just not that case. I don't put out - unless I'm asked very, very politely, and that's not putting out, that's just giving in.