1st Valentine's Day: 200,000 BC men and women congregate on opposite sides of Pangaea, waiting for someone to make the first move.

I would like to be known as someone who was really sweet but also knowledgeable in all areas of life.

Another goal that I have is to learn how to play the ukulele - should be fun - and to stop taking my clothes off for money. But I need money. That is a ridiculous goal. I'm gonna cross that one off. That's stupid.

This is very ambitious, but I don't care. I'm just gonna go ahead and find Amelia Earhart. Every day that goes by, I just fear the worst for her.

If I'm having a fancy glass of champagne, I'll always mix it with the champagne of beers. Because I deserve all the champagnes.

Fingernails are for opening things and toenails are for storing precious minerals off the ground.

As you can see, I speak many languages, including the language of sex.