1st Valentine's Day: 200,000 BC men and women congregate on opposite sides of Pangaea, waiting for someone to make the first move.

I'm so happy to be around people. I just really like people, and being a freelancer can be lonely during the day, when you're at home trying to write anything you can.

I think I've always had a disconnect from what I'm supposed to be like.

Turkeys are peacocks that have really let themselves go.

Mel: Does Bret's girlfriend look anything like me? Murray: A little, around the eyes. Mel: Oh yeah? Big eyes huh? Murray: Well... she's got eyes.

The service at this airport restaurant is so bad I'm starting to panic that I'm a ghost.

I diagnosed my loneliness as premature empty nest syndrome.