The first time I was on TV, on "Flight of the Conchords," someone put up a YouTube clip and said, 'You're too ugly to be on TV.' And I was like, 'That is exactly why it's a good thing that I'm on TV.'

I would like to be known as someone who was really sweet but also knowledgeable in all areas of life.

Most of the people I know in comedy are not weird or messed up.

The first time I was on TV, on "Flight of the Conchords," someone put up a YouTube clip and said, 'You're too ugly to be on TV.' And I was like, 'That is exactly why it's a good thing that I'm on TV.'

One good thing about being locked in a cage: No responsibility!

He resisted for a while and there were some legal boundaries, you know, keeping me from being near him or his family, but in the end, love overcame. And I got what I wanted. I always get what I want.

Fingernails are for opening things and toenails are for storing precious minerals off the ground.