Turkeys are peacocks that have really let themselves go.
I diagnosed my loneliness as premature empty nest syndrome.
Just because I'm married to Doug doesn't mean I can't be here for you.
I'm just happy our nations are on the same page of keeping shitty reality TV on the air. Small world!
One good thing about being locked in a cage: No responsibility!
I used to carry a rabbit's foot for luck. Then it was a monkey's paw. Now it's a camel's toe.