I think I've always had a disconnect from what I'm supposed to be like.
I used to carry a rabbit's foot for luck. Then it was a monkey's paw. Now it's a camel's toe.
All the best movies are the ones that are cut from a more middle ground.
Just because I'm married to Doug doesn't mean I can't be here for you.
Turkeys are peacocks that have really let themselves go.
A kiss is like a fight, with mouths.