The torture that they are coming up with in China is so creative. They have this other method where they'll take a bamboo and they'll plant it in your anus and just let it grow. So patient. Man, watch out for China, I say. They have all the ambition as we do but none of the heart.

Fingernails are for opening things and toenails are for storing precious minerals off the ground.

A kiss is like a fight, with mouths.

As you can see, I speak many languages, including the language of sex.

The service at this airport restaurant is so bad I'm starting to panic that I'm a ghost.

Oh man, the car could just burst into flames right now and this would be the way to go, huh guys?

I'd hate to be a writer forever and never perform, and I'd hate to perform and not write. I get sad if time has passed and I haven't written or made anything. I'm an artist.