Humor has been the balm of my life, but it's been reserved for those close to me, not part of the public Lana.

How does it happen that something that makes so much sense in the moonlight doesn't make any sense at all in the sunlight?

If you stay away from parties, you're called a snob. If you go, you're an exhibitionist. If you don't talk, you're dumb. If you do talk, you're quarrelsome. Pardon me while I change my nail polish.

Well, I'm going up and up and up - and nobody's going to pull me down!

All men are alike. The approach is different; the result is always the same.

My goal was to have one husband and seven children, but it turned out to be the other way around.

Humor has been the balm of my life, but it's been reserved for those close to me, not part of the public Lana.