A good compromise is when both parties are dissatisfied

Hitler really ruined that mustache for everybody. It’s really an interesting mustache, but now, no one can wear it.

I’d rather have the thieves than the neighbors - the thieves don't impose. Thieves just want your things, neighbors want your time.

I'm trying to elevate small-talk to medium talk.

Being Larry David on Curb Your Enthusiasm was the best thing to happen to Larry David in life.

Anything that's for free, people will take. They don't discriminate.

Who do you think has more freedom: the married man in America or the single man in Communist China?