Everyone has a family tree; the Dawsons have one, it's a weeping willow.
How can you analyse what is funny? What's funny to one isn't funny to another... What's funny to you is a personal thing.
I discovered the wife's got asthma. Thank God - I thought she was hissing at me.
My mother-in-law had to stop skipping for exercise. It registered seven on the Richter scale.
There is a remote tribe that worships the number zero. Is nothing sacred?
I need to give affection and love, because without that, I wither. I need to give that love to someone. Without that, I'm rudderless.