Last year my wife ran off with the fellow next door and I must admit, I still miss him.

I know my name will always be linked with women.

My mother-in-law had to stop skipping for exercise. It registered seven on the Richter scale.

Marriage is an institution and that's where a couple finishes up.

I took the wife's family out for tea biscuits. They weren't too happy about having to give blood though.

I went to my doctor and asked for something for persistent wind. He gave me a kite.

My mother-in-law has so many wrinkles, when she smiles she looks like a Venetian blind.