Valentine's Day: the holiday that reminds you that if you don't have a special someone, you're alone.
Lewis BlackJesse Ventura is basically proof that the people of Minnesota are not social drinkers... they are obviously alcoholics.
Lewis BlackI think one reason people play golf is it allows them to obsess about something other than the daily crap. It takes your mind off that.
Lewis BlackThere is no better moment than this moment, when we're anticipating the actual moment itself. All of the moments that lead up to the actual moment are truly the best moments. Those are the moments that are filled with good times. Those are the moments in which you are able to think that it is going to be perfect, when the moment actually happens. But, the moment is reality, and reality always kinda sucks!
Lewis Black