I'd much rather sit next to a smoker in a restaurant than a nose-blower.
They tore out my heart and stomped that sucker flat.
There is something wrong when you wait in line thirty minutes to get a hamburger that was cooked for ninety seconds an hour ago.
When My Love Returns from the Ladies Room, Will I Be Too Old to Care?
Kinky sex involves the use of duck feathers. Perverted sex involves the whole duck.
Baptists never make love standing up. They're afraid someone might see them and think they're dancing.