To me, art supplies are always okay to buy.

You have to be aware of who you're talking to in an audience.

America's a family. We all yell at each other. It all works out.

Most Americans have so much crap, that you could lose most of it and still have way more stuff than the average Canadian.

Kids are like buckets of disease that live in your house.

If I found myself alone on planet Earth, no other humans, I would have sex with a monkey in like two minutes. Two minutes. That's really not long enough to be sure you're alone on the Earth, even. That's like... I walk outside, it's- there's not much traffic. "Oh, my God, it's just me! I'm gonna have sex with a monkey right now. Oh, no-there's a person."

You have to do a show as honestly as you can. But you also can't afford skepticism, because it's preparing for failure, which is useless.