All moralistic judgments, whether positive or negative, are tragic expressions of unmet needs.

Never hear what a jackal-speaking person thinks, especially what they think about you.

If you are a jackal, you will try to reassure. Jackals try to fix people in pain. They can't stand pain, but make matters worse by trying to get rid of it. Put on giraffe ears. Try to hear what they are feeling and needing.

Expressing our vulnerability can help resolve conflicts.

As NVC replaces our old patterns of defending, withdrawing or attacking in the face of judgment and criticism. We come to perceive ourselves and others, as well as our intentions and relationships, in a new light. Resistance, defensiveness, and violent reactions are minimized.

Praise and reward create a system of extrinsic motivations for behavior. Children (and adults) end up taking action in order to receive the praise or rewards.

Regardless of our many differences, we all have the same needs. What differs is the strategy for fulfilling these needs.