My wife and I have a perfect understanding. I don't try to run her life, and I don't try to run mine.

Most attorneys practice law because it gives them a grand and glorious feeling. You give them a grand - and they feel glorious.

Some kids want to know why the teachers get paid when it's the kids who have to do all the work.

I don't worry too much about sex education in the schools. If the kids learn it like they do everything else, they won't know how.

War toys are scary. They have a rocket launcher with a bayonet attached, in case you miss.

Just remember, golf is flog spelled backwards.

You can lead a man to Congress, but you can't make him think.