My wife is a real Puritan. She thinks licking the stamp on the envelope of a Valentine is foreplay.

My son really has the spirit of Valentine's Day. When he was in college, he used to send his mother a heart-shaped box of laundry.

I don't date women my age. There aren't any.

My wife wants something foreign for Christmas - like a Mexican divorce.

I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how to make it interesting.

The last time I saw Marilyn was in late 1959, when I appeared in Let's Make Love at Fox. The wide-eyed Marilyn I had first known was gone. This Marilyn was more beautiful than ever.

My wife and I have a perfect understanding. I don't try to run her life, and I don't try to run mine.