It's amazing how fast later comes when you buy now!

I was in a department store and I saw a weird-looking gadget. I asked the young saleslady what it was. She answered, "It doesn't do anything. It's just a Christmas gift."

I bought an ideal gift for my mother-in-law - a battery-operated mouth.

They've got plastic Christmas trees now. They're hard to tell from the real aluminum ones.

I bought my mother-in-law a beautiful chair for Christmas, but she won't let me plug it in.

My wife wants something foreign for Christmas - like a Mexican divorce.

My son gave me a nice bottle of cologne - Eau de Owe.