Valentine's Day is like Armistice Day - you declare a truce.

You're aging when your actions creak louder than your words.

My wife sent me a Valentine card that said, "Take my heart, take my lips, take my soul." That's just like her. She kept the good parts for herself.

This is how it is today: The teachers are afraid of the principals. The principals are afraid of the superintendents. The superintendents are afraid of the board of education. The board is afraid of the parents. The parents are afraid of the children. The children are afraid of nothing!

If you hire relatives, you'll have a payroll that won't quit.

Poverty is not a disgrace, but it's terribly inconvenient.

Folk who don't know why America is the Land of Promise should be here during an election campaign.