Nowadays, when a speaker tells the graduates that the future is theirs--is that a promise or a threat?

I don't mind personal insults, but when you insult the jokes that I tell you're insulting Fred Allen, Bob Hope, Burns and Allen, Trevor McGee and Molly Picon.

Nowadays, when a speaker tells the graduates that the future is theirs--is that a promise or a threat?

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.

Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases.

I have a brother who is afraid to go to sleep, he dreams he's working.

Valentine's Day is the day when you remember that Cupid was a lousy shot.