Most attorneys practice law because it gives them a grand and glorious feeling. You give them a grand - and they feel glorious.

In the suburbs it's hard to buy your Christmas gifts early in the year. You never know who your friends will be in December.

Laughter is the best medicine in the world.

I'd rather be a could-be if I cannot be an are; because a could-be is a maybe who is reaching for a star. I'd rather be a has-been than a might-have-been, by far; for a might have-been has never been, but a has was once an are.

It's always consoling to know that today's Christmas gifts are tomorrow's garage sales.

Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases.

Remember when you had your face lifted... and the guy brought it back.