I don't date women my age. There aren't any.

I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how to make it interesting.

There are a lot of things money can't buy. Not one of them is on my son's list.

Sex at eighty-four is terrific, especially the one in the winter.

We owe a lot to Thomas Edison - if it wasn't for him, we'd be watching television by candlelight.

My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already.

Nowadays, when a speaker tells the graduates that the future is theirs--is that a promise or a threat?