Valentine's Day is the day when you remember that Cupid was a lousy shot.

My brother applied for work, but was told by the company that it had more employees than it needed. My brother said, "Don't worry. The little bit of work I do won't be noticed !!!"

At Christmas you can get real bargains. I saw one item marked down ten dollars. It was a yacht.

My son really has the spirit of Valentine's Day. When he was in college, he used to send his mother a heart-shaped box of laundry.

At the Christmas party, the secretary with the long red hair ate three pickles, and four salesmen panicked.

My wife and I have a perfect understanding. I don't try to run her life, and I don't try to run mine.

Valentine's Day - a nice holiday because it's the first day of the rest of your wife.