Now that doctors have stopped making house calls, lots of patients now have to die without their help.

Most attorneys practice law because it gives them a grand and glorious feeling. You give them a grand - and they feel glorious.

Valentine's Day is like Armistice Day - you declare a truce.

My brother applied for work, but was told by the company that it had more employees than it needed. My brother said, "Don't worry. The little bit of work I do won't be noticed !!!"

Valentine's Day is the day when you remember that Cupid was a lousy shot.

Our tree was so puny we used orthopedic bulbs.

Laughter is the best medicine in the world.