At eighty-two, I feel like a twenty-year-old, but, unfortunately, there's never one around.
I bought an ideal gift for my mother-in-law - a battery-operated mouth.
I like to think of myself as the middleman between Fred Allen and Henny Youngman.
I really doubt whether evolution ever works, how then come Mothers have only two hands
Santa is having a tough time this year. Last year he deducted eight billion for gifts, and the IRS wants an itemized list
There are a lot of things money can't buy. Not one of them is on my son's list.