I bought my son an indestructible toy. Yesterday he left it in the driveway. It broke my car.

I just bought a great gift for my boss - a leaky ant farm.

I bought my son a bat for Christmas. On New Year's it flew away.

I know why superman left krypton. Earth was the only place where he could get steriods!

My wife and I were shopping for the whole family. In the music department my wife said, "Let's get your nephew a set of drums. That's what your brother did to us last year."

In the suburbs it's hard to buy your Christmas gifts early in the year. You never know who your friends will be in December.

Folk who don't know why America is the Land of Promise should be here during an election campaign.