I bought a Christmas tree for twenty dollars. When I came home the next day, my wife was wearing it in her hair.
It was a tough school. The kids on the debating team took steroids!
I never stole a joke in my life. I just find them before they're lost.
Do you realise that Eve was the only woman who ever took a man's side?
Folk who don't know why America is the Land of Promise should be here during an election campaign.
My sister-in-law found a real surprise in her stockings - my brother.