Sometimes I get really lonely. Especially when I'm throwing a Frisbee.

I don't like grouper fish. Well, they're okay. They hang around star fish. Because they're grouper fish.

I play the guitar. I taught myself how to play the guitar, which was a bad decision... because I didn't know how to play it, so I was a shitty teacher. I would never have went to me.

I saw this wino, he was eating grapes. I was like, "Dude, you have to wait".

My apartment is infested with koala bears. It's the cutest infestation ever. Way better than cockroaches. When I turn on the light a bunch of koala bears scatter. But I don't want 'em to, you know, I'm like "Hey, hold on, fellas. Let me hold one of you. And feed you a leaf."

I rented a car. I didn't really need one, I just wanted to make one less available. I wanted one businessman on the bus with no car.

I want to rob a bank with a BB gun. "Give me all your money or I will give you a dimple! I will be rich, you will be cute. We both win."