You know me, I love lost causes.

That feeling of hopelessness only serves your masters.

A conservative doesn't want anything to happen for the first time; a liberal feels it should happen, but not now.

You know me, I love lost causes.

If you were the only person left on the planet, I would have to attack you. That's my job.

Professional comedians, surprisingly, have a lack of humor. They're insensitive to the insanity of our times.

A conservative is someone who believes in reform. But not now.