A political satirist's job is to draw blood. I'm not so much interested in politics as I am in overthrowing the government.

If anybody comes up to you and says, My kid is a conservative - why is that? you say, Remember in the 60′s when we told you if you kept using drugs your kids would be mutants?

Nixon's the kind of guy that if you were drowning fifty feet off shore, he'd throw you a thirty foot rope. Then Kissinger would go on TV the next night and say that the President had met you more than half-way.

You know me, I love lost causes.

Professional comedians, surprisingly, have a lack of humor. They're insensitive to the insanity of our times.

If you can't join them, beat them.

There's a danger our fiscal bankruptcy might overtake our moral bankruptcy.