Humor is the best means of surviving in a difficult world.

Every new year is the direct descendant, isn't it, of a long line of proven criminals?

Among other things I think humor is a shield, a weapon, a survival kit. So here we are several billion of us, crowded into our global concentration camp for the duration. How are we to survive? Solemnity is not the answer, any more than witless and irresponsible frivolity is. I think our best chance lies in humor, which in this case means a wry acceptance of our predicament. We don't have to like it but we can at least recognize its ridiculous aspects, one of which is ourselves.

People who have what they want are very fond of telling people who haven't what they want that they don't want it.

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.

How Sunday into Monday melts!

Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.