He without benefit of scruples - His fun and money soon quadruples.

Certainly there are lots of things in life that money won't buy, but it's very funny- Have you ever tried to buy them without money?

Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.

There once was an umpire whose vision Was cause for abuse and derision He remarked in surprise, 'Why pick on my eyes? It's my heart that dictates my decision.'

How confusing the beams from memory's lamp are; One day a bachelor, the next a grampa. What is the secret of the trick? How did I get so old so quick?

Maybe I couldn't be dafter, But I keep wondering if this time we settle our differences before a war instead of after.

Sleep is perverse as human nature, Sleep is perverse as legislature.... So people who go to bed to sleep Must count French premiers or sheep, And people who ought to arise from bed Yawn and go back to sleep instead.