Too much Chablis can make you whablis.

A husband is a man who two minutes after his head touches the pillow is snoring like an overloaded omnibus.

This is my dream, It is my own dream, I dreamt it. I dreamt that my hair was kempt. Then I dreamt that my true love unkempt it.

And you stagger down to break your fast. Greasy bacon and lacquered eggs And coffee composed of frigid dregs.

When I ponder my mind I consistently find It is glued On food.

A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips stick.

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.