Stuyvesant chats with Kelly and Katz, The professor warms to the broker, And life is good in the brotherhood Of an air-conditioned smoker.

I have an idea that the phrase weaker sex was coined by some woman to disarm some man she was preparing to overwhelm.

The doctor gets you when you're born, The preacher, when you marry, And the lawyer lurks with costly clerks If too much on you carry. Professional men, they have no cares; Whatever happens, they get theirs.

Certainly there are lots of things in life that money won't buy, but it's very funny- Have you ever tried to buy them without money?

There is something about a martini, Ere the dining and dancing begin, And to tell you the truth, It is not the vermouth- I think that perhaps it's the gin.

Whenever you're wrong, admit it; Whenever you're right, shut up.

Then here's to the heartening wassail, Wherever good fellows are found; Be its master instead of its vassal, and order the glasses around.