The cow is of the bovine ilk: One end is moo, the other, milk.

Humor is hope's companion in arms. It is not brash, it is not cheap, it is not heartless. Among other things I think humor is a shield, a weapon, a survival kit.

You are much happier when you are happy than when you ain't.

An occasional lucky guess as to what makes a wife tick is the best a man can hope for, Even then, no sooner has he learned how to cope with the tick than she tocks.

How easy for those who do not bulge to not overindulge!

When you're wrong admit it, when you're right, shut up.

Never befriend the oppressed unless you are prepared to take on the oppressor.