There is something about a martini, Ere the dining and dancing begin, And to tell you the truth, It is not the vermouth- I think that perhaps it's the gin.

When a lady's erotic life is vexed God knows what God is coming next.

Humor is the best means of surviving in a difficult world.

A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips stick.

To maintain your marriage brimming, with really like in the wedding cup, anytime you are incorrect, admit it each time you're proper, shut up.

Some one invented the telephone, And interrupted a nation's slumbers, Ringing wrong but similar numbers.

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.