Some debts are fun while you are acquiring them, But none are fun when you set about retiring them.

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.

Some one invented the telephone, And interrupted a nation's slumbers, Ringing wrong but similar numbers.

All husbands are alike, but they have different faces so you can tell them apart.

The codfish is a staple food For which I'm seldom in the mood. This fish is such an utter loss That people eat it with egg sauce.

Here is a pen and here is a pencil, here's a typewriter, here's a stencil, here's a list of today's appointments, and all the flies in all the ointments, the daily woes that a man endures -- take them, George, they're yours!

Whether elected or appointed he considers himself the Lord's anointed, and indeed the ointment lingers on him so thick you can't get your fingers on him.